Toon välja viimase aja huvitavama (imeliku)kõneluse taksojuhiga, kes meid reede õhtul linna viies nõxsa ärevusse ajada otsustas. Loomulikult suutis ta selle sõidu jooksul palju rohkem ära seletada, kui mina tagantjärgi meenutada, kuid aljärgnev peaks kogu jutuajamise sisust siiski piisava ülevaate andma.
Hey, can you take us to red Cheetah?
To where???
Red Cheetah. It’s in downtown.
What?! Why you want to go there???
We heard that its a nice place.
Ohooo, let me ask you something. How long have you been in Cincinati???
About nine months.
Hmm. Okay! Let me tell you something about Cincinati and that place. You see we have a lots of black people living in here okay. And they have some areas in towndown, where they don’t want to see white people. You know what I am saying? And Red cheetah is in that kind of area. okay… you get in to a fight I am telling you, and you don’t want that right??? Hahahaa. Red cheeta o my!!!Shit!!! Perhaps I take you some were else??? Thers one weary nice place called “Metropolis” Have you been there?? A lots of fresh meat. Hahaahaa. You’re trying to get laid tonight? Well, nice looking guys like you, it should be no problem but in cheetah you get busy with some fighting. I mean if someone asks you out then don’t go. I am serious. I am 61 and planning to live at least 62 wears, so that’s why I don’t go to Red cheetah. Hahahaa. You guys have some balls, I give you that okay. Red cheetah o my!!!
Where you from?
From Estonia.
Where???
And what you speak there?
Estonian.
Aa hahahaaa it makes sense.
You guys know some Estonian Karate or kung fu??? Ou man, you definitely need that shit tonight. Fucking black people they are dangerous. You have any guns with you tonight?
No.
Knife or something?
No.
NOOO???? Are you kidding me dudes?? Hahaahaa. Ou my god… Better act like you wear one, okay. You have to look tough and dangerous. Show them like you're backing some meat.
You got some brass balls man… Red cheetah ou my ou my… You know why they call it like this???
No
Cheetah is for those things on the trees and red is for blood. Red monkeys. HAHAHAHAHAAAAAA. Bloody little monkeys. You see those dudes over there? (Osutab näpuga mingile rondile, mis meist mööda kihutades musti räpigäkstereid täis näib) I bet they are going also there. –Hahahaaa. Look this is what you get! So are you’re knees shaking already??? Hahahaa.
Hey to you mind if I smoke one cigarette in the car?
No I don’t. Enjoy it. Probably it is you’re last one. What the fuck is wrong whit that traffic light??? Shit, go green. We're on a mission…
good luck. Was nice to know you.
Kui me selle verise ahvi sissepääsu juurest algavat umbes saja meetri pikkust järtsi silmitsesime, siis ei näinud me seal absoluutselt mitte ühtegi valget inimest. Ainult üks paks libu kimus nurgapeal suitsu. Ja nii kui me sappa võtsime ilmus kuskilt välja üks pomps, kes tahtis lennukiga Hawaile oma naise ja lapse juurde minekuks meilt puudujäävat dollarit küsida. Saades eitava vastuse, otsustas mees endast välja minna ja valjuhäälselt keeldumise põhjust rassismist tuleneva mittehoolivusega seletada. Õnneks ei osutunud taksojuhi kartused tõeks. Mustad vennad ei hakanud meid peksma vaid ajasid hoopis pompsu minema. Sellest hoolimata jätsime paksu libu ainsana sellese järjekorda valgeid esindama ja tulime sealt tulema. Suundusime üle jõe Kentuky poolele ja läksime nn valgete hoodi, kus ei olnud enam hambuni relvastatud veriseid ahve, kes valgeid kutte tappa soovides neid sealt otsivad.
Igaljuhul kulges õhtu veriste vahejuthtumiteta ja lõpetasime kuskil homo karaoke baaris, kus üks keskealine mees (ilmselt homo) laulis
Blow me
You hardly even know me
just set yourself below me
and blow me... tonite.
a handy
would certainly be dandy
but it's not enough to slow me
you gotta blow me... allright.
when you part your lips that way
ooo... I want you night and day
when you squeeze my balls so tight
I wanna blow my load with all my might!!
so blow me
you hardly even know me
just set yourself below
you gotta blow me tonite
"Come on everybody!!!" (whole audience joins in)
Blow me
You hardly even know me
so blow me
you gotta blow me
so blow me
Blow me tonite!Mida tegi Silver gay baaris? See oli erinevalt ülejäänud kohtadest kella viieni avatud.
Laupäeva hommikul aga läksime tivolisse ja saime endile lõpuks veriste ahvide hävitamiseks shot gun-id. Meenutavad vähekene fööne või mis?